Ongoing Response

As a teacher you may be uncertain how to respond over time to a child who has disclosed physical or sexual abuse. Acknowledge the situation and try to "normalize" things as you would with divorce, death or other traumatic experiences. It is not helpful to dwell on the abuse incident. This only serves to increase the child's self-consciousness and shame.

Some ways to respond to the child which will help build self-esteem and a sense of safety and security:

• If school policy allows, maintain contact with the caseworker or therapist and the non-offending parent(s).
• Refrain from touching a child who has been sexually abused. For these children, all touch may mean sexual touch. A non-intrusive touch, such as an arm around the shoulder, should be given only with the child's permission and with caution.
• Do not tolerate inappropriate behavior. Do not let the child climb all over you. Instead, sit the child on a chair next to your chair. Sometimes it is appropriate to refuse touches in a gentle assertive way.
• If the child brings up the abuse, try to find a time and place to be alone. Offer reassurance that you are sorry it happened, that you know the situation is difficult, that you are glad he or she told, and that you will continue to support and care for him/her.
• Be aware and respectful of family members. Respect their feelings and privacy.
• Be prepared for depression or "let down" weeks or months after the disclosure. Withdrawal or acting out may occur.
• If the abuse is brought up in a group, acknowledge it and tell the child you will talk to him/her about it privately. (You could say, "I am so sorry that happened to you. I am glad you told me. Let’s talk about that privately after class.") Then follow through and talk to the child that day.
• All children need to know they are likable. Abused children are particularly susceptible to feelings of low self-esteem.